unknown to the unknown
i’ve often wondered if it would be better to be a reclusive celebrity or a highly accessible nobody. given, the pressures of fame would weigh down on you. but so would the pressures of being simply ordinary. there’s no glory in that.
i think perhaps the temptations that arise in people seeking private celebrities might cause some stress. stalking would be reserved for the highly zealous. it would make you look twice around that corner after you’ve crept out of bed for a glass of milk. then again, there’s always restraining orders. or pistol permits.
i think i may be coming back around for the first time in many months. i actually have a few things to look forward to. it is a good feeling. it’s like the feeling you get after eating a good meal, and realizing that tomorrow will bring another good meal. i think about food a lot, among other things.
how come tv dinners have great-looking food on the box, but when you open it everything is all fucked up and tossed around? i don’t buy the “product settles” excuse. i think it’s the russians messing with us. glasnost my ass. actually, that sounds painful.
i’ve become tired of people abusing listservs. to the clueless, a listserv is an email address that everyone subscribes to. if you send something to a listserv, everyone subscribed to that listserv gets the message. it’s actually quite nifty. but it has given me reason to question the mental acuity of my fellow majors.
“hi every1 i am looking for some1 2 help w/ my film project it will b a hour shoot call me 5555555 if n e 1 is intrested thx” [sic]
this is bad enough. until his/her fellow idiots reply (once again, to the whole department).
“hi my name is jon and i want 2 help w/ ur project i can b there at 3 but no sooner thx bye” [sic]
i’m often tempted to reply to these people using three words: “just kill yourself.” but i’m not actually in favor of suicide. so instead i wait for my good friend karma to strike these people down at whichever moment darwinian theory deems appropriate.
i’m quite naive. perhaps so naive as to think that idiots will eventually find their comeuppance. i’m also naive enough to hope that this conflict resolution will have some degree of irony to it. irony is rather sweet, after all.
but enough of my pretentious diction. you probably came here for happy words about flowers and unicorns and shit. or you’re here thinking that my disregard of capitalization makes me a hypocrite. that and my sentence fragments. well, go walk into a river.
unless, of course, you’re an okay person. or better. then you can go wait in the line over there where they’re giving out free brownies.
don’t search for a meaning. there isn’t one. don’t look for answers when they don’t exist. this is the meaning of life. or perhaps, as Vonnegut’s Kilgore Trout wrote:
To be
the eyes
and ears
and conscience
of the Creator of the Universe,
you fool.
